Surrender

I have my own version of Fantasy Island.

I am on a gorgeous tropical island. There is no Tatoo, just me screaming to the heavens, 'Da pain, Da pain!'

With that, a shirtless Wolverine (Hugh Jackman, for the uninitiated in comic based movies) arrives at my side, waves his beefcake arms and...

POOF!

The pain disappears, I return to my pre-diseases self (lose near about 80 lbs and some wrinkles), turn to my Hubby and kids laughing, and we head to the beach to the live happily ever after.

Yeah. NOT LIKELY TO HAPPEN.

So, instead, I realize today that yes, after suffering with this nightmare flare for the last week and a half (although it has been building longer) I will give in and go for the prednisone taper.

Surrender.

I hate taking the vicodin but I have been and you know its bad when doubling up ain't cutting it. That was always the benchmark that my original rheumy recommended.

For those who don't like TMI, avert your eyes now, for the brave, stay for a glimpse more.

It has been so bad that I have been avoiding washing my hair. Today, I suffered thru it the first time since Sunday. It was awful. Elbows screaming while shampooing and rinsing and conditioning. Feet hurting from the tension of clinging to my balance.

Thank heavens I am blond and sparse in the hair department. No leg shaving happening this week either. I could go for about 3 weeks before anyone would ever notice. BUT, I know.

Usually nothing stops me from shaving the 15 stubbly hairs under my arm, because Hubby HATES hair. It's a thing with him. Actually gags when they show the girls on Survivor with underarm hair. I laugh at him. Anyhow, I always, always, always do that shave - unless it is in the midst of the flare from hell.

Yep. No shaving the pits today. Bending the elbows more than I had to do for the hair? No way. Holding that small handle in my sore hands? Nah uh. Not gonna happen.

Yep. Time to surrender.

Thankfully, I have the prednisone in the house. Will probably do 60-40-30-20-10 -5mgs. I won't sleep the first night because of the jitters. Second night, I may get some winks of sleep but it will be fitful and full of nightmares. By 24 hours in I will become voraciously hungry. And, thirsty which means lots of potty trips. Ugh.

BUT, but about day 3 I will start to realize... wow, my joints are not as sore and I am able to move better and with less pain.

Yay.

New rheumy thinks this is more Lupus and Fibro than RA. Old rheumy thought more RA, maybe lupus, probably Fibro too.

I think it all SUCKS.

Surrender.

Thank heavens for the COFFEE.

be well...